I’ve been knocked off my square.

Yesterday, a friend of mine at work told me she would be getting surgery February 23rd. ‘They’re looking for something,’ was what she said.

Over the course of the shift, I slowly absorbed the implications of this statement.

This is someone I work with often. She is strong-willed and bossy and opinionated and an excellent nurse. We have our differences of opinion, but we work together well. We both work very hard and try our best to improve our unit. I’m always learning something from her.

I don’t consider us close. We don’t hang out, but we do attend the same activities and classes. We get along well.

Which is why I am puzzled at my reaction. How exactly am I supposed to feel about this? What can I do for her? And why do I feel so unsettled? You saw my post yesterday – my emotions were so conflicted and scrambled, I could barely cope with the stupid everyday crap I usually brush off.

I took it kinda easy on myself today. I ran, then had Bubba do some running, took O’Baby and Bubba out in the snow, goofed around, made dinner – just lightweight stuff. Until I can piece this all together, in my heart and my head, I will continue to take it easy.

I don’t like this unsettled feeling. Not at all.